Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Day 10 -- Why I'm Here

Ever since I turned thirteen I wanted to be a writer.  The idea of crafting worlds for others to enjoy seemed like a fantastic idea and a terrific creative outlet for someone who couldn't sing, act or paint.   I spent most of my childhood making up characters that I could become or devising make believe obstacles that I needed to overcome.  However, I couldn't spell worth a damn and hand writing one page took almost an entire hour, so writing anything of value took so much concentration and time that I always stopped after a few paragraphs.

It turned out that I have dyslexic dysgraphia, a learning disability that I didn't discover until age 23.  I did OK at school, but by now I've grown so creatively lazy that putting together a story seemed not only tedious, but incredibly daunting.   Besides, I'm the kind of guy who goes to a party and can only manage to strike up conversations with the host's inbred gerbil and the guy who smells vaguely like bologna.  I'm mostly dull, ornery and a tad North of Center (whatever that means).  Those qualities don't usually translate into published author -- unless you're Nathanial Hawthorne.

But having a kid changed my outlook and made me re-examine my dreams.  Up to that point the most significant thing I accomplished -- besides all that marriage and reproducing junk -- was being on a three man team that ate 42 bean burritos in a single sitting.  I want to be some one the Princess looks up to. Her hero, not some dude who sits on the couch watching reruns of Quantum Leap on Netflix.  How can I be a role model to my little girl without pursuing at least one of my dreams?  And until they invent a personal inter-dimensional transporter or a man to fish translator, I guess I'll pursue writing.

So, after a year or so of prodding from the Queen, I put finger to key and Losing the Internets was born.  At first the ides was to convince myself that creative writing wasn't some impossible chore and to possibly develop a personal writing style.  Instead, I find myself writing for others instead of myself.  The greatest joy that comes from this blog isn't when I finish what I think is a particularly witty post, but the reaction from friends, friends of friends, and (most of all) strangers.  It's amazing the absolute thrill I get when someone likes what I wrote enough to hit share on Facebook.

That may sound insecure, but deep down don't we all want Mommy to hang our artwork on the refrigerator door?

Now I feel like I have to push myself to get better and faster at writing while growing this community.  The 30 Days of Shameless Self-Promotion acts as my marathon, a test to see if I have the fortitude to keep going.  Luke had to raise his X-Wing to get off Dagobah, The New Direction had to beat Vocal Adrenaline to win Nationals, Peyton Manning had to best Tom Brady, and I have to beat myself.  And as dirty as that sounds,the 30 Days of Shameless Self-Promotion shall not overtake me. I will become a more concise writer.  I will grow this audience.  I will emerge the victor!  Remember the Alamo!

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Please note:  My editor decided to fall asleep -- and snore loudly -- before this post was finished.  If you find egregious errors, please consult the management. 

2 comments:

  1. I'm sure your editor appreciates the shout out! I love this post. It made me feel your passion, and even though I'm already a big fan, this made me feel really excited for you and your goals. Also, as...exciting?...as the burrito challenge sounds, you have accomplished more than you think. Even if preble promise is no longer operating, you instilled loyalty from your underlings (myself included), and that is no easy feat.

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    1. I prefer to call you my minions. But thank you for the warm fuzzies!

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